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Home The Real Law of Attraction CDs Life Essentials Seminar on DVD Learn to Meditate CD Course Other Products FREE Seminar Weekend Course Relationships Film About Michael Rowland Emagazine and Relationships Articles	*- Relationships Film –* *Bulletin Four* Now the Holiday break is over, we can continue with our bulletins. I have decided to keep these bulletins to be about relationships only, as all the responses I am getting are about relationships and none about film making. This will give more space for relationships information ============================================ *Relationships:* Whatever happened to you, in your early life, becomes embedded into your mind as a series of programs and patterns. What is external to you, when you begin your life, becomes internal as you grow up. The events and circumstances of your early life, and your reactions to them, become literally hard wired into your brain and nervous system. This means you have automatically downloaded into yourself whatever was going on with your parents, siblings, relatives, teachers, friends and anyone else who was around. You are moulded and shaped to have particular ideas, beliefs and opinions, as well as behaviours and characteristics, whether you like it or not. This reality of downloading, or impressing on your mind, is well known. But what is less well known is that this loop continues throughout your life. And it is this completion of the circle, which creates your relationships. As an adult, whatever you internalised during your upbringing, now goes back out in the identical and exact terms as it went in. The internal now becomes the external. You can only behave and make choices which come from these inner programs. What else can you do? It is all that is within you. You can’t have thoughts or behaviours which are not in your mind already. It is like trying to speak Chinese if you have only been bought up to speak English. Chinese is not in there, so you have no access to it. This externalising of your internal programming, is just like a pot, which is filled up with pumpkin soup. When it is poured out, it is never going to be celery soup, however much the pot may want it to be. It is always going to be pumpkin. What this means for your relationships, is that you attract into your life, *and find attractive, people who match your subconscious patterns. You are subconsciously driven to seek out people who you can play out these patterns with, whether you consciously want it or not. You feel strongly attracted to those people who have the potential to dance your own subconscious dance. For instance, if your mother or father had difficult problems in their life, which caused them great unhappiness, this would have affected you greatly as a child. You really wanted them to be happy, and you tried your best to make them happy, which is normal for a child. When you grow to be an adult, you may be subconsciously driven to have relationships with people who also have problems, who you can try to heal, in the subconscious hope that you are actually healing your parents. Or, let’s say you were a boy with an older sister, who always put you down when you were growing up. As an adult, you may be attracted to a woman who you can argue with and attempt to win against, in order to try to resolve the constant subconscious feelings of being subservient to a woman, which was built up in the relationship to your sister. The possibilities are endless. But, underneath all the huge variety of adult behaviours, is the single desire to be loved and express love. People sublimate the need for love into their career, money, success, skills, academic and other achievements, hoping to find the approval which will make them lovable in the eyes of those who bought them up. And they carry the same need for love and approval into their relationships. The only solution is to create yourself into a loving being. Because, if you did not learn to truly love as a child, you cannot give or receive love without deliberately turning yourself into a person who loves. It just isn’t in there, like trying to speak Chinese if you were bought up to speak English. Many people mistakenly wait for the right person to come along, who will love them, and then they believe they will be able to feel love within themselves. They often wait till the end of their life before they realise they have made a fundamental error. It is they, themselves, who has to learn to love and to open their own energy system to allow love to flow. Some people believe that they should love everybody. But this is an impossible task and shows that they have no consciousness of how they and others have been conditioned. It is far better to learn to love one person, or better still your spouse and children, which is the perfect situation for learning to love. So how do you do it? Well, love is a verb. It is something that you do. You constantly do loving things and express yourself in loving ways. You intentionally mould your behaviours into loving ones, day by day, week by week, month by month and year by year. And, as you do this, you find that your system starts to open more and more. Energy can now flow where before there were blocks, and not only can you express love, but you can also feel it within yourself. The key is to start small, just like a small shoot can grow into a giant tree. Begin to turn yourself into a loving person by doing simple, practical things So, here are three ideas to help you become more loving: 1). Spend a few minutes before you come home thinking about how you can uplift your partner and/or children. Arrive with an unexpected gift which means a lot to them. Or have an interesting story to tell, or anything which will bring the relationship together for pleasure and enjoyment. In other words decide on a contribution which will make them know they are being considered and cared for. 2). If you feel flat and de-energised, take a few minutes to meditate, in the car or in the park, before you go home. Close your eyes for several minutes to let the tiredness pass. Breathe deeply of fresh air. Stretch out your body with some Yoga postures. Arrive home in an energised state. It is hard to be loving and interested when you are tired. 3). Constantly encourage and inspire those you live with. With children, as well as adults, tell them how pleased you are to see them do so well. Show you care about what they think, that you respect their input and ideas. Be responsive and interested. Always avoid anything other than friendliness and connected behaviour. Relationships can be the greatest source of joy and fulfilment you ever experience, if you study how to do them properly and make their success the major goal of your life. Next issue, I will give you some more of these steps and ideas, as well as another article on how to create a great relationship. Do send me feedback if you are enjoying these bulletins and let me know if there are any other points you would like me to cover. For your responses and questions about relationships, please email me at:* film@pnc.com.au *TELL A FRIEND:* Please advise your friends, who would like to subscribe to these bulletins, to go to: http://www.lifeact.com/RelationshipsFilm.htm

- Relationships Film –

Bulletin Four

Now the Holiday break is over, we can continue with our bulletins. I have decided to keep these bulletins to be about relationships only, as all the responses I am getting are about relationships and none about film making. This will give more space for relationships information

============================================

Relationships:

Whatever happened to you, in your early life, becomes embedded into your mind as a series of programs and patterns. What is external to you, when you begin your life, becomes internal as you grow up. The events and circumstances of your early life, and your reactions to them, become literally hard wired into your brain and nervous system.

This means you have automatically downloaded into yourself whatever was going on with your parents, siblings, relatives, teachers, friends and anyone else who was around. You are moulded and shaped to have particular ideas, beliefs and opinions, as well as behaviours and characteristics, whether you like it or not.

This reality of downloading, or impressing on your mind, is well known. But what is less well known is that this loop continues throughout your life. And it is this completion of the circle, which creates your relationships.

As an adult, whatever you internalised during your upbringing, now goes back out in the identical and exact terms as it went in. The internal now becomes the external.

You can only behave and make choices which come from these inner programs. What else can you do? It is all that is within you. You can’t have thoughts or behaviours which are not in your mind already. It is like trying to speak Chinese if you have only been bought up to speak English. Chinese is not in there, so you have no access to it.

This externalising of your internal programming, is just like a pot, which is filled up with pumpkin soup. When it is poured out, it is never going to be celery soup, however much the pot may want it to be. It is always going to be pumpkin.

What this means for your relationships, is that you attract into your life, and find attractive, people who match your subconscious patterns. You are subconsciously driven to seek out people who you can play out these patterns with, whether you consciously want it or not. You feel strongly attracted to those people who have the potential to dance your own subconscious dance.

For instance, if your mother or father had difficult problems in their life, which caused them great unhappiness, this would have affected you greatly as a child. You really wanted them to be happy, and you tried your best to make them happy, which is normal for a child.

When you grow to be an adult, you may be subconsciously driven to have relationships with people who also have problems, who you can try to heal, in the subconscious hope that you are actually healing your parents.

Or, let’s say you were a boy with an older sister, who always put you down when you were growing up. As an adult, you may be attracted to a woman who you can argue with and attempt to win against, in order to try to resolve the constant subconscious feelings of being subservient to a woman, which was built up in the relationship to your sister.

The possibilities are endless. But, underneath all the huge variety of adult behaviours, is the single desire to be loved and express love. People sublimate the need for love into their career, money, success, skills, academic and other achievements, hoping to find the approval which will make them lovable in the eyes of those who bought them up. And they carry the same need for love and approval into their relationships.

The only solution is to create yourself into a loving being. Because, if you did not learn to truly love as a child, you cannot give or receive love without deliberately turning yourself into a person who loves. It just isn’t in there, like trying to speak Chinese if you were bought up to speak English.

Many people mistakenly wait for the right person to come along, who will love them, and then they believe they will be able to feel love within themselves. They often wait till the end of their life before they realise they have made a fundamental error. It is they, themselves, who has to learn to love and to open their own energy system to allow love to flow.

Some people believe that they should love everybody. But this is an impossible task and shows that they have no consciousness of how they and others have been conditioned.

It is far better to learn to love one person, or better still your spouse and children, which is the perfect situation for learning to love.

So how do you do it? Well, love is a verb. It is something that you do. You constantly do loving things and express yourself in loving ways. You intentionally mould your behaviours into loving ones, day by day, week by week, month by month and year by year. And, as you do this, you find that your system starts to open more and more. Energy can now flow where before there were blocks, and not only can you express love, but you can also feel it within yourself.

The key is to start small, just like a small shoot can grow into a giant tree. Begin to turn yourself into a loving person by doing simple, practical things

So, here are three ideas to help you become more loving:

1). Spend a few minutes before you come home thinking about how you can uplift your partner and/or children. Arrive with an unexpected gift which means a lot to them. Or have an interesting story to tell, or anything which will bring the relationship together for pleasure and enjoyment. In other words decide on a contribution which will make them know they are being considered and cared for.

2). If you feel flat and de-energised, take a few minutes to meditate, in the car or in the park, before you go home. Close your eyes for several minutes to let the tiredness pass. Breathe deeply of fresh air. Stretch out your body with some Yoga postures. Arrive home in an energised state. It is hard to be loving and interested when you are tired.

3). Constantly encourage and inspire those you live with. With children, as well as adults, tell them how pleased you are to see them do so well. Show you care about what they think, that you respect their input and ideas. Be responsive and interested. Always avoid anything other than friendliness and connected behaviour.

Relationships can be the greatest source of joy and fulfilment you ever experience, if you study how to do them properly and make their success the major goal of your life.

Next issue, I will give you some more of these steps and ideas, as well as another article on how to create a great relationship.

Do send me feedback if you are enjoying these bulletins and let me know if there are any other points you would like me to cover.

For your responses and questions about relationships, please email me at:
film@pnc.com.au

TELL A FRIEND:
Please advise your friends, who would like to subscribe to these bulletins, to go to:

http://www.lifeact.com/RelationshipsFilm.htm